


day 5: the way you breathe (the way i fall asleep)

by halfwheeze



Series: thirty ways to seek the giant [5]
Category: Buzzfeed Ladylike (Web Series)
Genre: Airports, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-23 14:30:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14334489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfwheeze/pseuds/halfwheeze
Summary: in which jen comes home.





	day 5: the way you breathe (the way i fall asleep)

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to day 5 of the jelsey challenge! this aims to last 30 days with a prompt every day, and i hope you enjoy!
> 
> day five is reminders!

Anxiously touching her fingertips to the bracelet hanging slightly loose around her wrist, she looks around the airport impatiently, not wanting to make eye contact with any in the sea of strangers surrounding her. She’ll just  _ know  _ when Jen has reentered the same room as her after a month and a half, she thinks, because Jen is the center of her being. She learned that when Jen had to go back to Boston to do some interviews for her college, some kind of giving back to the kids who are there now. Kelsey likes to pretend that she doesn’t know all of the details, a hold out from a her that was less obsessed with her significant other, less committed to the idea of commitment, less hopelessly in love. It’s another thirty minutes before Jen’s even scheduled to fly in; Kelsey just couldn’t stay home alone anymore. 

A million things go through Kelsey’s mind that could go wrong, which isn’t even normally her kind of thing. Anxiety is one of her smaller issues, nothing like the severity of other anxiety disorders that she’s seen, so she’s always minimized the way it affected her personally, that is, until Jen. Before Jen, Kelsey didn’t even really know that she was a protective girlfriend at all, letting all kinds of things happen before she even though to check on her datemate at the time. Now, she thinks about the things that Jen goes through all day, what could make Jen happy during a day, what could make her stressed. The worry in her head makes her worry at the bracelet around her wrist, twisting it between the fingers of her other hand until she has to let go of it for fear of breaking it. Then, she starts twisting it a little again, softer this time, thinking of the bracelet’s origin. 

The thin bracelet is silver, sized purposefully so that she would be able to take it off without unclasping it, and it has gemstones of varying blues. It has a subtle K and an even more subtle J on opposite sides of it, the J shining carved into a lighter blue stone, and the K on a darker one. Jen had given it to her when they got together, like a courting gift or something, with the immediate assurance that it could totally be a friendship bracelet if Jen read everything wrong. Kelsey had fallen in love right there, held Jen’s face and kissed her like she meant it, even though she had meant to wait. She does feel it when Jen finally comes into the room, lifting her head like a dog catching a scent. There she is. Jen grins as soon as she sees her across the crowded room, and then she seems to make an impulsive decision in her head, breaking into a free sprint to Kelsey. 

“Jen, no!” Kelsey exclaims, and then Jen is barrelling into her, backpack and all, and it’s all Kelsey can do not to fall down, let alone catch her. Jen may be strong enough to carry  _ her _ , but be  _ fucked  _ if Kelsey can do the same for her on command without a couple hours of emotionally preparing herself. Jen laughs and wraps her arms around Kelsey’s neck when they get settled in standing again, and Kelsey just puts her arms around her girlfriend’s waist like nothing happened. After the past six weeks of not seeing hide nor hair of this beautiful, impulsive, wonderful girl, it’s like nothing did happen. It was only a little tackle. At least she’s here. It feels like Kelsey can breathe again. 

“Hey babe,” Jen says, soft and excited, and Kelsey doesn’t know when she started crying, but it’s happening now. She’s crying and it’s soaking into Jen’s light yellow button up and she  _ loves  _ Jen in yellow because it’s her favorite color, it’s Jen’s favorite color, and Kelsey is getting tears and maybe a little mascara on it. Jen must feel it because her hands tighter on Kelsey’s shoulders and move down to pull Kelsey’s arms from her waist, pushing Kelsey into holding onto Jen’s shoulders so Jen can grab at her waist instead. She’s pulling her so close and she feels so  _ safe  _ for the first time in six fucking weeks and Kelsey doesn’t know when she started needing Jen so badly that it hurt, but it’s happening now. She aches with needing her close and that’s the best she can do. The best she can do is simply ache, because it’s better than bleeding or speaking it aloud. 

“I missed you,” Kelsey says simply, and then she laughs, because that’s a fucking understatement. Jen laughs even though she can’t understand the joke, can’t understand that Kelsey is the fucking joke here, and Kelsey loves the sound. She’s only heard it over the tinny quality of FaceTime and phone calls and the occasional video posted to Jen’s story or sent over Snapchat. The sound of Jen’s voice is cleansing as fuck, but the sound of her laughter is revitalizing, practically a whole new experience now that Jen is home. Kelsey doesn’t know when she started thinking of the two of them as the other’s home, but it sure is happening now. She doesn’t know how long they stand just like that, soft laughter and holding each other in a way that can’t be appropriate in an airport, but it isn’t nearly long enough. Jen pulls away from her softly and forces her to lean down even further, cupping her face in both of her hands. Kelsey smiles despite herself. 

“There you are. I missed you, Kels,” Jen imparts, just looking at Kelsey for maybe ten seconds before leaning in to kiss her. The kiss is the softest shit they’ve ever done together, slow and real and calming and fantastic, and this is a better reminder than the bracelet. Jen beneath her hands and the feeling of their lips together and the two of them in the same space, being themselves together, is the best reminder Kelsey could ever be given. Jen is the best reminder she could ever be given. 

“Let’s go home,” Kelsey says after they break apart, putting a kiss on Jen’s temple and taking her suitcase from where Jen had just left it sitting beside them. She’s such a pretty trainwreck. 

“Yeah,” Jen replies with a grin, and then they’re gone. 

**Author's Note:**

> leave me a prompt @halfwheeze on tumblr if you want and i'll get to it when i can!


End file.
